Sorry I’ve been gone so long. Been working on health-care reform. I know these things take time, but I’m officially sick of it. Wonder if I’m covered for that?

Myself, I try to deal with insurance companies the least I possibly can, kind of like mosquitoes. *(Writer’s aside: I was pondering what to say instead of “mosquitoes.” Religious zealots, lying Republicans, lying Democrats and thruthful telemarketers were my first thoughts. Yet, mosquitoes came to mind and I typed it in. Then, I realized some medical insurance companies are kind of like mosquitoes, sucking you dry for whatever they can.)*

KSRW’s personality extraordinaire Bob Todd (l) and Mammoth Liquor owner and Bob’s brother, Spike Todd (r) as they research background for Mammoth’s Medical Marijuana ballot measure during a recent excursion to the Bay Area.

Self-editing note: Go easy on the “writer’s aside” from now on.

But health-care reform, like everything else dealing with money, is difficult. It’s all relative. From multi-billion dollar government packages to million-dollar hospital upgrades to thousand-dollar cosmetic surgeries (dont’ ask) to a $1 lottery ticket, it’s all relative. I lost both $1 lottery tickets over the weekend, by the way.

Finances, money. A close to second to matters of the heart (and, now that I think about it, other organs) in the realm of human existence.

My guess is that’s how it all shakes out in music, movies, literature and everything else in life: No. 1 – Love, physical and mental. No. 2 – Money, earned or stolen. And when you combine the two, you get Jesse James cheating on Sandra Bullock.

Sandra Bullock seems to have missed the day in school when they taught, to both boys and girls, “Don’t marry someone who has already been married to a porn star.” (I distinctly remember that day; I was home-schooled.)

The story goes this James dirtbag was allegedly having a fling while Bullock was filming the movie in which she ultimately won an Oscar. She wins the award, and days later this sordid news comes out.

I know there’s been worse Hollywood stories, but since this was Miss Congeniality saving a busload of people while welcoming a poor, young man who was not of her race getting

cheated on by a cable bad boy, Jesse James defintely wins “Jerk Face of All Time” (non-murderer division).

Hold it. I’ve just been informed there’s someone entering the competition who goes by the name of Tiger (He can back up an 8-iron but not an SUV) Woods. Jesse, Tiger. Tiger, Jesse. You guys can exchange notes later.

I’ll be back soon, after I dwell more on the realm of human existence. Should make for another solid “writer’s aside.”