People First: The Heart of Real Leadership

I picked up Leaders Eat Last again the other week — a book I’d underlined, dog-eared, and once read in a single sitting. Simon Sinek’s words hit me differently this time. One of his core messages is simple but profound: leadership isn’t about being in charge; it’s about taking care of the people in your charge.

Before you ask for performance, you have to give people safety — the kind of psychological safety that lets them feel seen, valued, and protected. When people believe they’re cared for, they don’t just work harder; they believe harder.

I’ve worked in places where “results” were the only thing that mattered. Every meeting, every memo, every new initiative revolved around the next metric we had to hit — higher academic achievement, higher test scores, higher everything. The feeling was that if we all bought into the initiative, performance would rise, and we’d all feel good about what we’d accomplished.

But that never really happened. Because people don’t buy into initiatives; they buy into their leaders.

When there’s no focus on the people expected to do the work, the workplace begins to crack. Complaining, infighting, and quiet sabotage take root. The leader, frustrated, often turns their disappointment toward the team — the very people whose trust has eroded.

Sinek writes, “Performance can and does boost morale in the short term, but that feeling does not last. In contrast, when the focus is put on morale first, performance will follow, and the strong feelings will last.” I’ve seen that truth play out time and again. When leaders put people first — truly first — they build the foundation for trust, purpose, and loyalty. The result? Less cynicism. Less apathy. More energy directed toward a shared mission.

For a while, I commuted from Sacramento to Richmond on the Amtrak. Most mornings, the train swayed gently through the Delta, sunlight sliding across the water. On those rides, I was often joined by a friend — a psychologist from the Bay Area who worked with inmates in Alameda County. His work was heavy; he met people every day who carried unimaginable pain and trauma.

One morning, over coffee and the low hum of the train, we started talking about psychological safety. He told me, “It’s the foundation of every relationship. If people don’t feel safe, they won’t open up. They won’t tell you their truth.”

That stayed with me. Whether you’re trying to help someone heal from trauma, make new friends, or build a great workplace — it all begins with safety. In organizations where people feel protected and not threatened, something magical happens: you get discretionary effort. That extra mile people choose to give — not because they’re told to, but because they want to.

Without that safety, you get the opposite: unplanned absences, resistance, skepticism. It all depends on the leader.

Psychologist Ronald Riggio describes bad bosses as “tyrants, bullies, or just incompetent.” Their power and willingness to play dirty can make it seem like their shadow reaches every corner of your professional — and even personal — life. Barbara Kellerman of Harvard takes it further in her book Bad Leadership, outlining seven types of problematic leaders: incompetent, rigid, intemperate, callous, corrupt, insular, and evil. What ties them all together is their ability to inflict stress — especially on subordinates.

Leaders who ignore psychological safety often slide, slowly and unknowingly, into toxicity. Disconnected from their teams, they become blind to the damage they cause. Insulated from the truth, they convince themselves they’re doing well — and that their employees are the problem.

But great leaders do the opposite. They stay grounded, self-aware, and curious. They:

Know their limits and ask for help.
Stay flexible in their systems and processes.
Remain calm and confident when challenges arise.
Are fair, thoughtful, and consistent.
Seek honest feedback.
Share resources generously.
Welcome respectful disagreement.

In healthy workplaces, you’ll always find people willing to challenge their leader — and leaders who don’t take it personally. That’s a sign of trust.

Because the truth is, the people on the front lines — the teachers, the customer service reps, the nurses, the staff who interact with the public every day — they are the heartbeat of any organization. They make mistakes. They bring their personal struggles to work. But they also bring their experience, education, and commitment to making things better.

It’s the leader’s responsibility to meet them where they are — to address the rough edges, encourage their best, and remind them why they matter.

At the end of the day, leadership isn’t about initiatives, charts, or slogans. It’s about relationships. When you build trust and psychological safety, you don’t just get better results — you get better people showing up to do meaningful work.